Fantasy

Ahi tuna

Had dinner tonight at The M Resort with the 'rents. We went to Anthony's. It was good. We sat at a table right next to the glass looking into the grill in the kitchen. Loved it but watching them cook all the huge pieces of meat was hard given my current I-only-eat-fish-and-vegis situation. After the hostess sat us the server came over and introduced himself as Bill. He was cute. Lean like Bill from Seablue. He looked at me kind of strange, cocked his head and said, "I think I remember you." Oh Christ. It's never a good thing when a man says that to me. What drunken idiot girl thing did I do or say to him. "You've been in here before." Thank God. Then it clicked. He was so good looking that I wouldn't have minded if I'd slept with him but turns out he actually waited on us the last time we were there. Whew. He was the perfect blend of playful & absent. My perfect kind of waiter. I hate it when they hover. I can pour my own Pellegrino into the glass. I don't need someone to do it for me.

Sea bass

I started with the ahi tuna. I could have eaten 4 of these little rosebuds. So delish and I love it when they put roe on stuff. I love squishing them in my mouth like manual pop rocks. Dad got the bone in filet. George Bennett is munching on the bone now. The filet actually had 2 bones on it so he'll get another one tomorrow. Poor dog. He's so neglected and abused. Mom got the halibut. I tried to stay away from it because it rested in lemon butter but I should have gotten that instead. My pan seared sea bass was yummy but entirely smothered in a butter-based sesame soy glaze. The word 'glaze' should have been my clue to stay away from it. It was good but if you're watching your calorie intake I suggest getting the halibut or asking for it sans glaze. 

George Bennett's dinner

We talked about old times - my cookie monster birthday cake when I was a toddler, our old house, the time I went to work with my dad, funny stories about how people gave my mom their seat on the Monorail because she looks like a little old granny, the fact my dad retired 16 years ago. It's crazy to think that he retired at 56. 

The check came and dad paid, of course. No matter how old I am, I'm still their little girl. I don't even challenge them anymore. "Of course we're paying," my mom says. I love that about them. It's nice to be taken care of once in a while. 

After dinner we hit the (ugh) slot machines for about an hour. Dad went on his own and I hung with my mother. I loathe gambling but I get to spend alone time with mom and we bond. She's so funny. She checks out slot machines like I eat my sushi. There's a process and it can't be rushed. She takes her time to prepare, picks the right one, lingers a bit to make sure it looks good and then dives in. She knows the machines she likes, what icon you need to get into the bonus round, how much to bet, which machines are new, where to cash in. It's simply adorable in a Q-tip/senior citizen kind of way. I hate throwing away my money like that so I only bet the minimums. She's betting a dollar a pop. Not massive by any means but the thought of dropping a hundred bucks in a machine in an hour gives me acid reflux. Now ask me (pre or post current health trend) if I'd lay down $100 on a bottle of wine or some foie, hell yes! We all have our priorities. 

Love that The M has Dyson
dryers in the restrooms

I drove them back to the MGM. Dad always asks me how my car is running. I'm sure he's never asked my brothers that. "Good, dad." It's a 2011. It'd better be running well. He knows it. He just likes to check on me. "How's the (portfolio)?" Yeah, I'm not as good at saving as they were but I'm doing fine. He knows that too. He actually manages it for me. There's no one on earth I trust more with my money. I love that they'll always take care of me for as long as they're alive but it makes me sad that the only thing I can give them in return, I haven't. A grandchild. They have never, ever, ever, ever asked or put any kind of pressure on me but since my oldest brother and his wife aren't having kids (by choice) and my middle brother is now dead, I'm their only hope for a grandbaby. I feel guilty for letting them down. They don't see it that way and think I'm ridiculous. They tell me they are proud of me & love me just the way I am but really, what are they supposed to say. "Amy, you suck as a human being because you aren't married or in a relationship and don't have kids like the rest of the world." I feel like since they gave me such a great gift in adopting me as an infant, the least I can do is give them a grandchild. But life hasn't worked out that way for me. Yet still I have hope. I just want to do it in the correct order: find Mr. Right, date, fall in love, get married, enjoy time together, have a baby, raise a child, grow old together, die. Jesus, I'm a control freak even in my Fantasy life.